What the?! (No Comments)

So just when I thought I had experienced all the gross, freaky and nasty things I could possibly experience as a mother, this happened…

.

We spent the weekend in northern Ontario at our lake house.  We swam, boated, kayaked.  We had so much fun.

.

I got the kids out of the lake around 3pm yesterday afternoon and we dressed and packed the van.  By 5pm we were on the road, heading home.

.

Half an hour into the drive, 12 year old Sabrina shrieked,”Mom, I have a leech between my toes!  STOP THE CAR!”

.

I replied calmly, “Honey, I’m sure it isn’t a leech.  We never have leeches in our water.”

.

Sabrina went into full fledged panic attack, complete with the sweats, tears and heavy breathing. Her friend, Emma, who was sitting next to her, math book in her lap, was frozen in her place.

.

I nudged my sleeping 22 year old cousin, Emily, who had joined us at the cottage for the weekend.  “Deal with this please!” I said.

.

Emily twisted in her seat and said ” It’s not a leech, Sabrina.”  But then she turned and I saw that her face said otherwise.

.

I continued driving for another 10 minutes because I didn’t want to stop on a busy two lane highway and risk our safety for a ‘maybe’ leech.

.

Finally I saw a parking lot and pulled over, jumped out.

.

Sabrina opened her door and stuck her foot out at me.  And there.  Poking up between her two middle toes.  There it was.

.

So. A leech.  Out of water for over 2 hours.  In the middle of no where.  Forest everywhere.  And absolutely no salt in the car.

.

I asked Emily to Google ‘how to remove a leech without salt’.

.

And then I tried to put pressure where it was attached to force it off.

.

But it was just as determined as I was.  And it wouldn’t let go.

.

Until I pressed my jagged nail into it as hard as I could…this caused Sabrina to cry even more.  But it also caused the leech to pop off.

.

I flung it away from us.

.

She wasn’t bleeding.  But her tears were plentiful. I grabbed her face and kissed her wet, salty cheeks.

.

As I got back into the car, no one spoke.  We drove in silence and all I could think about was, why didn’t I take a picture of that? Or get Em to video?  But I knew that if I had taken time to get my phone out, I would have been labelled the ‘worst mother ever’.  So I didn’t and now we don’t have proof of the grossness that we experienced.

.

After about 20 minutes, when Sabrina had begun to recover and could speak again, she said “I wish you had taken a picture of it!”

.

Me too.

 

It’s been a loongg time.. (No Comments)

Whoa!  Part of the reason why it has been so long since I last wrote about my children is because they aren’t little and cute anymore.  Now they are big, a couple are even bigger than me.  And to be honest, I don’t find them funny most of the time because usually they are driving me crazy.  They always want to eat.  Seriously!  Why do they have to eat so much! And they want me to drive them everywhere and they won’t take a bus.  Ever.  Although Jack did take a bus to go see his girlfriend last week.  That was good.

.

Anyway, so much time has passed and things have changed.  I’m in menopause.  And man, no one tells you how awful this time will be.  People make jokes about hot flashes and mood swings but believe me when I say there is nothing, I repeat, nothing, funny about it.  I’ve been sleeping with my window open, even all last winter long, with a fan blowing directly on me.  I use only a thin blanket. I wear a tank top.  No socks.  Hubby is burrowed under his own thick duvet. (Yes, we have our own sheets and blankets, smartest thing I’ve ever done).  He is cold.  I am hot, one leg sticking out from under my thin blankie.

I haven’t worn a sweater in two years.  I have gone from being freezing all the time, to feeling like I’m walking on the surface of the sun about 10 times in 24 hours. And, the sun is hot.  Very hot.

.

In addition to all the other gross and awful things currently happening to my body, I now have white hair growing-IN MY EYEBROWS.  Seriously.  So I have been plucking them out.  But I had to stop plucking them because they are getting too thin and now that I am 47 and estrogen deprived, they no longer grow back.  So I have long, gray, curly eyebrow hairs growing amongst my sparse brown eyebrow hairs.  My eyebrows are starting to resemble my  75 year old father’s.  Only his are fuller.

.

So tomorrow I am heading to Sephora to have them tint and work wonders on my brows.  They need help.  I will pay whatever it takes. I hope I don’t have big black ‘painted on’ eyebrows after.  That would be bad…but it might be an improvement from my Grampa brows.

.

The good new is, there is no sign of nose or ear hairs yet…  Something else to look forward to, I guess.

The plague (No Comments)

I work with 6 year olds and so, not surprisingly, they have coughed/sneezed in my face once too often and successfully transmitted the plague to me.

.

I’ve been laying in my bed for the past five days, propped up with pillows, not covered by any blankets.  And yes, it may be February but the bedroom window is wide open because between the fever and my menopausal hot flashes, I feel like I’ve been stuck in a sauna.

.

This has been the least of my problems.

.

While being super weak with influenza, bronchitis and sinus/throat infection, I have not been getting out of my bed and going downstairs in search of food and drink.  I’ve been busy feeling sorry for myself in between exhausting fits of coughing and asthma attacks. For sustenance, I have relied on my children to attend to me.

.

Which explains why I have lost a full 7 pounds in five days.  Because even though my two eldest children have been home from school because of exams, they have been very busy sleeping in and keeping in touch with their friends all day long.

.

After the second day of being ignored, I gathered enough energy and staggered into the hall to yell at them for being self centred and uncaring.  I wanted to tell them that they would be sorry when I am dead, but I didn’t (this time).

.

Then they felt guilty and after a horrifying bronchitis/asthma fit brought on by my rage, offers of tea in my favourite Ikea cup and cut up oranges started coming my way.  This was the best they could do, but it’s actually all I wanted.

.

I’ve warned them all that after I have successfully shared the plague with them, they will not see me again until they are completely recovered.  They can expect the same level of care from me as they showed to me…Now don’t think me entirely cold hearted.   I have warned them to begin stockpiling non-perishables in their rooms for the days when they are too weak to get out of bed.  Bottles of water would be a good place to start.

My altenheimers is acting up (No Comments)

I started a wordpress blog a while ago with this exact title.

.

However I haven’t had a great deal of time to write much.  So now, rather than trying to manage two blogs and my family and my teaching and my writing, I am consolidating my thoughts on Alzheimers, into this location.

.

Growing up, whenever my mom would forget something, normal forgetting, she would say ‘my altenheimers is acting up’ as a joke.

.

Now that joke is a reality and my mom is suffering from dementia.  When I say suffering, I mean it.  Sure, she is in early to mid stages still but she is suffering. Emotionally and mentally.  She is worried and anxious, pretty much all the time.

.

I am looking into getting her a geriatric specialist now who will follow her as the disease progress.  But I need someone good, who is caring too.  Not someone who is going to separate us at appointments and keep us apart for hours until my mom threatens to call the police on them just so she can go home.  This happened, I am NOT kidding.

.

Anyway, my mom is doing okay.  And the good news is that I am handling it better too.  Sometimes it is about me, ok?

.

I was crying every day last year when we got the diagnosis.  I took a day and cried until I couldn’t cry any more and I haven’t cried since…ok, not much at least.  I feel like I am better able to cope with it now.

.

While my mom is doing ok, the person she was, was gone a year ago.  I’ve mourned that loss.  I’ve even accepted it, I think.  And now we are moving forward.

.

My mom is losing her ability to speak properly, meaning she is often having difficulty selecting the words she wants to say and sometimes when I speak with her, she doesn’t know what I am saying.  Like when I asked her to chop something and she didn’t know what the word ‘chop’ meant…she used to know.  This has happened with other words too.

.

I am trying to focus on the fact that my mom is still here.  She is still alive.  And she can laugh and smile.  Does she get confused?  Sure.  Don’t we all?!  I grew up being afraid of losing my mother so I am really glad now that I  still have her.

.

Sometimes you just have to look at the glass as being half full.

 

Times change (No Comments)

Hello!
This blog used to be only about my family but as time has passed and my kids have gotten older and less cute (heehee) I have realized that it is time to change things up.

I have decided to included other parts of my life in this blog that make up a big part of my life. Two things that I will be writing about are my mom’s struggles with Alzheimers as well as my own journey with my writing career.

I will still include posts about my kids when there is something to share. But for now I think that this makes the most sense.

Happy new year!