Change room secrets (No Comments)

I spent yesterday morning at the doctor’s office having my physical and an ultrasound (and no, I am NOT pregnant!!!!)

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As I am always cold, I did not relish the moment that they asked me to remove my clothes and put on the gown that opens at the back.

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The minute the technician told me to get undressed, it was like a race began.  On your mark! Get set. GO!!  I flung the curtain shut and ripped off my clothes as fast as I could, because, of course, I was afraid that they would be ready for me before I was completely undressed and I didn’t want to be caught with my pants down!  Then, once I was garbed in my gown, I began the process of neurotically folding my jeans and sweater into a tidy pile, hiding my bra and underwear underneath my pile of clothes like a guilty thief hiding their contraband. I mean, God forbid that someone should see my polka dot undies or a wayward bra strap, after all, that would be waaay more embarrassing than what I was about to endure in the examination room.

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I finished getting undressed and doing my housework in about 10 seconds flat, and then I realized how cold I already was.  Luckily I had worn a big, black knit scarf around my neck that morning, so I ended up wrapping it around my body like an old Italian lady.

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Ten minutes later, when they finally called me, I had one hand clutching the back of my gown shut and the other hand gripping my granny shawl around my shoulders, along with my purse.  I seriously contemplated wearing my brown UGG style boots but decided not to and just kept my white ankle socks on… After all, if nothing else, I still had my pride and fashion sense to consider…

Artful negotiations… (No Comments)

My husband is a very smart guy.  But in some areas he is slow.

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We have been married for over 12 years, you would think that by now he would have learned a few things about our relationship.  Like when we are hanging pictures and I ask what he thinks-I DON’T REALLY CARE what he thinks?  Some questions are just meant as rhetorical, you know what I mean?

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He says ‘no’, I say ‘yes’, we go back and forth for a while about a certain wall and then I go back to my original suggestion and finally I need to remind him that he is just the labour force, I don’t actually need or want his opinion.  I am the decorating manager and he is the contractor.  All I really want is for him to go get his hammer and picture hanging thingys and get to work, he isn’t required to talk to me.  It is as simple as that.

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This weekend we hung the plasticine art that my friend made me for my birthday and I will concede that we did end up hanging them on a wall that he suggested.  But I did hold my own for a while until he managed to change my mind.

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So now the pics are hung, but with hubby discussing matters with me it took much longer than it needed to.

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It’s so hard to find good help nowadays…

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