I was selected randomly to participate in this study, which basically follows a group of people for 20 years and documents what ailments we succumb to as we age.  Of course I’m hoping to be in the disease free group as a result of my vitamin D supplements!

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I had to go to their offices for a 2 hour visit on Friday, fill out questionnaires, have some tests done and give urine and blood samples.  This is unpaid, of course, so I went out of the goodness of my heart, and the fact that I am crazy bored during the day and have absolutely nothing else to do…it was a good way to get out of doing the laundry if nothing else!

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There were a bunch of lovely ladies who did all the interviewing, testing and blood drawing.  They took 6 viles of blood, and in return, I got my parking paid for and a juice box and cookies.

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When it was time to go, and all results were made available in a report, I was called into an office to have them explained to me before I left.  It was a cute, young guy who had the honour…It was just my luck that a cute, young guy got to read the result that said my waist size is too large, instead of the ladies that I had been previously dealing with.  Why the cute, young guy? Why?  The ladies would have understood that I have given birth and therefore have a much deserved pooch. I’m not so sure that a cute young guy would understand that…So of course I made jokes about my waist being higher than they thought, and that I needed to hit the gym immediately-or at least as soon as I regained all the gallons of blood they took out of me!

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Anyway, just had a protein shake for breakie and now I’m off to the gym to do 5000 crunches, wrapped in saran wrap!!!!

Not sure how it happened…I’m still getting used to the fact that I am a mother, let alone the fact that I have a ‘tween’!!

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Where has the time gone?  How can my baby girl be 11 years old now?

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Paulina and Jack and I stopped at the grocery store to buy food for dinner yesterday and as I was instructing them in the fine art of loading the cart, I noticed a tiny little pimple on Paulina’s face….It would have been fine if I left it at that, with just noticing, but no, I had to be a thoughtless MOM and comment on it, in public, in front the cashier.  A cashier who was ‘youngish’ and had a nose ring no less…

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I said “Oh Paulina, you have a tiny little pimple at the corner of your eye-that’s strange!”  Well, in my defense, that IS strange, isn’t it???  Anyway, she immediately turned tomato red and I felt really bad…so I said, “I’m sorry, I shouldn’t have commented on your pimple while we are standing in the check out…that was embarrassing, wasn’t it?”

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Paulina said, “Yes, Mom, a LITTLE embarrassing…Thanks…” I think she just wanted me to shut the hell up and stop saying the word PIMPLE.

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The cashier politely averted her eyes and smiled sympathetically at Paulina when she thought I wasn’t looking…What is wrong with me?  What kind of mother points out pimples in public?

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To make myself feel better, I told Paulina that she has embarrassed me lots of times while out in public, and she knows it’s true…but I’m old enough to know better!!! There are some things that you just don’t talk about it, pimples being one of them.

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I still remember going shopping for my first ‘bra’ with my parents when I was around 12…my father thought it was funny to keep commenting loudly that ‘Kelly is buying her very first bra!!!’ over and over again through the store….I was traumatized to say the least.

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Will Paulina remember this day as traumatizing?  I doubt it…I’m quite confident that I will do something more embarrassing that will eclipse this event…I will try really hard not to…But I’m not sure I trust myself, I am a mom after all!

My almost 10 year old son Jeremy had a school project, an assignment to make a musical instrument.  So we went online to find out how to do this and then I was responsible for shopping and purchasing the necessary supplies.  I forgot… for a few days…

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And then I did it!  I did it, ok!?  And then, that night, Jeremy went to his friends house and didn’t make the trumpet that he was supposed to make.  The next day he (we) did…but it didn’t make a sound!!! So we went back to the computer, where we learned how to make an oboe out of a straw!  Luckily, we found one straw left in the house..made it…and it didn’t make a sound either…

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Jeremy did not want to make a guitar or a drum because that’s what everyone else was making.  We found a video for a tom tom, which is a drum, but with a balloon stretched tight on either end. ..So then I had to go find the proper size container, and then I had to cut the bottom off it with a very sharp knife…  Then I had to find a place for all of the ice tea that I had taken out of the container, Paulina made some and spilled it all over the floor…Turned out that we didnt have any balloons, so I needed to go out last night to buy them, as this project is due today.  Of course, the balloons were too SMALL!!!!TOO SMALL! So we tried saran wrap and that didnt work.  So, Jeremy made a kazoo of sorts out of a toilet paper roll.

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Then as I tucked him into bed I had a brilliant idea and made him get up and come downstairs with me… I took out the clay that I bought for the kids and we tried to sculpt whistles…Spent an hour trying to sculpt whistles.. I really thought I could do it, as I had the instructions up on the internet…spent over an hour…not one whistle makes a sound…not one stinking chirp!!!

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I wasn’t at all frustrated, honest! And when Jeremy tried to help me, I most definitely did NOT rip my creation away from him and tell him to get his ‘paws off my whistle’.

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Then my darling hubby walked in, and looked at me like I was insane…picked up the tubing we used for the stupid trumpet, stuck the kettle whistle in it and voila, in 30 seconds created an instrument that makes sound…He was so proud of himself…I was proud of him too..So proud, in fact, that I wanted to hurl my whistle at him and inflict pain…Jeremy felt badly for me, gave me a big hug…Hubby said I should be proud of him (meaning himself) because he did something creative for once, and actually used the left side of his brain…

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Humph…

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Anyway, I am so glad that this was my son’s project and not mine, because that would really have been a lot of work…  And if it had been my project, I would have made the @#$%%$$! guitar!

Hubby and I allowed our five young children to get Wii for Christmas.  They also got Rock Band to go with it, so now we are frighteningly similar to the Partridge family when we all have an instrument and make music together in the living room.

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Somehow, I have become the designated singer.  Probably because I really suck at playing the instruments and I know how to make my voice follow the guides on the screen so that it goes up or down when it should.  Please do not mistakenly believe that my voice is good…it most definitely is not.

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But what is amazing is this…  I have discovered through a very scientific study (that I conducted at my home), that the more wine I drink, the better I perform.

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It’s true.  It must have something to do with the alcohol loosening up my vocal cords, because after a glass or two of my favourite red, I must admit that I sound pretty darn good singing ‘white wedding’ and ‘eye of the tiger’.  Come to think of it, all of us start sounding better after I finish my glass of red…And if I have another glass, you should see how my dance moves improve too!

It figures…

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You know, I spend a lot of time writing, or thinking about writing.  I have a little notebook that I keep with me and jot down ideas immediately because if I don’t, they disappear from my brain forever.

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So, it’s been almost 9 months since I started fiveallmine.com and I am still enjoying it.  At times, it definitely is to blame for the unfolded laundry that multiples like rabbits in this house.  But I keep at it, regardless.

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What I really enjoy is checking my hit counter… and I check it frequently…one day alone I had over 900 hits which really, really excited me!  Other days, it’s not as exciting.  I also always notice when I have a new fan on facebook, or when I lose one, as happened when my oldest, dear friend, quit facebook a week or so ago, and therefore decreased my fan count to 50.

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So you can imagine my excitement when I logged on tonight and saw a new fan!  I immediately went onto facebook and looked, thinking my friend had seen the error of her ways and gone back to facebook, but no…

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Paulina’s friend from school, a very lovely girl, joined my fan page.  A very sweet thing to do, I know and I greatly appreciate it…But the fact is, I write about my kids here….

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And since I do try to protect my kids, from embarrassment among other things, I don’t think that I can allow their friends to join my fan page. I use my fan page to update people when I have posted something new… Sometimes we just chat there, but its also great because it lets a fans friends know when they have joined a group, providing a little free advertising and exposure.  If I allow my kids’ friends to join, they will be able to read the conversations on that fan page, receive updates themselves and all of their friends will see what groups they belong to, including fiveallmine.com.  You see what I’m saying?

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So, even though it pained me greatly, I deleted this lovely, 11 year old girl from my fan page just now.  I keep telling myself that this website is not meant for children…sometimes I may say a bad word, like darn, or insinuate something meant for more mature audiences, so how would I continue to write that way, knowing that my audience includes children?  And not just children, but friends of my kids even?  Well, I can’t.  So now I feel guilty, because I’ve deleted a fan, and a friend.